Ever wondered whether you are living or mere existing? Sounds funny? Isn’t it? No, I am not kidding. You need to ask yourself whether you are living or mere existing. The irony is that most of us merely exist in our life time and tend to think we are living. Oscar Wilde, an Irish poet and play wright, once famously said that “To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.”
I am sure that confusion still persists. Most of us fail to mark the difference between living and existing. Existing is a sweet trap we easily and conveniently fall into. It creates an aura of monotony and sluggishness. It tells you the price of everything and value of nothing. When you get up in the morning with full of energy, thank God for all the bounties He blessed you with and ponder your reason to exist that is living. By contrast, when you get up in the morning in all the boredom, curse your fate and do the things you have to do in order to survive, that is existing. Too many people consider living and existing as the synonymous. In fact, they are not. Agreed that to live, you need to exist, but to exist, you need not to live. At the rudimentary level, you do the things you need to do in order to exist. On the contrary, you do the things you want to do to live. Survival and happiness are the ultimate objectives of existing and living respectively.
Benchmarks of living versus existing: No matter whether you live or exist, your entire life revolves around four criteria i.e. purpose, engagement, activities and emotions with poles apart different results.
If you are living a life, your four criteria are:
- Purpose: You know the reason or purpose of your existence and relentlessly pursue it.
- Engagement: You do not get knocked down by your problems. Instead, you tell your problems that you too are a big problem to deal with.
- Activities: You control your life. Your life does not control you.
- Emotions: You feel a lot of emotions in your life. You feel happiness, sense of accomplishment, motivation, enthusiasm, contentment and above all fulfilment.
Now compare this with a life meant only for existing:
- Purpose: You live a purposeless life. Survival is probably the only purpose of existing.
- Engagement: You tend to react instead of respond.
- Activities: You do not control your life. Your life controls you.
- Emotions: You live an emotionless, dull and lifeless life.
Are you living or mere existing? Believe it or not, you can either live or exist. Choice is yours.
Questions you must ask yourself to decide whether you are living or existing: If you are not certain whether you are living or existing, ask yourself following five questions and you will get an instant answer.
- What is the purpose of my life?
- Why I am doing what I am doing?
- Do I really deserve all the bounties God has given me?
- Do I pay back to God for all His bounties?
- How the world will remember me when I will leave it?
Also read: Living or existing-Choice is yours
Always remember what Eleanor Torrey Powell, an American dancer and actress, had famously said, “What we are is God gift to us. What we become is our gift to God.”
It is easy to go through the life on autopilot mode, unimaginatively and listlessly. Just live everyday as the day before. You have a choice to either live your life or let someone else live your life. In the latter case, when you look back to the number of years you have spent, you will find nothing but regrets, misery and frustration. Living a life is mostly a matter of making choices. We make choices from dawn to dusk and these choices, in return, make or break our life.
If you want to live a life full of enthusiasm, positivity and happiness, you will have to choose between being proactive and being reactive. You need to find ways to set yourself free from the shackles of sluggishness and monotony. You will have to prove that you live your life and your life does not live you. Here is how:
Be careful of small things, big things will take care of themselves: Instead of feeling depressed for the US-China trade tussles, nuclear war or climate change hazards, focus your energies in finding pleasure in small things. You are not responsible for the entire universe, but you are responsible for your own universe. Next time, try to help some needy neighbour buy some grocery instead of trying to help USA resolve COVID-19 pandemic crisis. As the famous saying goes “Take care of the pennies, and the pounds will look after themselves.”
Change your routine: Monotony is the single biggest reason for a cheerless and dry life. Doing the same work again and again will only reduce your enthusiasm level and make you a slave of your routine. As they say the only things permanent in life is change. So, it is necessary to change gears and add some new activities to your life, which will give you happiness.
Set SMART and small goals: Would it be possible to summit Mount Everest without climbing a small hill first? You may have your life-long goals. There is nothing wrong in it. But it is equally important to break your life long goals into small, achievable day-to-day goals. It is important to set small goals which comply with SMART criteria i.e. they should be specific, measurable, achievable, realistic and time-bound.
Be honest in how you feel: It is important to be realistic about how you feel in a specific situation and avoid taking unnecessary pressure. You have the right to your space, your feeling and your choices. You need to permit yourself to feel human and experience the emotions that are coming to you. Any denial of your feeling will deprive you your one basic right-right to be yourself.
Explore what brings you happiness: You do not need to win a lottery of US$1 Million to feel happiness. On the contrary, happiness lies in feeling small things. UK’s leading life coach Carole Ann Rice says it is important to be mindful of the smaller day-to-day tasks which could be contributing to your happiness and schedule them into your routine.
Be grateful and show gratitude: Nothing could undermine the importance of being grateful and show gratitude. It is human psychology to feel depressed for the things you do not have and never be grateful for the things you have. In pursuit of your goals, it is natural to forget being grateful for the little things which matter a lot. You have two eyes through which you can see. As per WHO, there are at least 2.2 Billion people globally with vision impairment. Isn’t it a reason to be grateful? You go to bed after having a full dinner. Do you know at least 811 Million people worldwide go to bed hungry every day? Still, you do not see any reason to be grateful?
It is nothing less than a challenge to learn to live. Existing is no challenge at all. A man who wants to live will find a reason good enough to live for. On the other hand, a man who mere wishes to exist will also find a reason to exist. Living or existing is only a matter of choice. One should be mindful and respectful of one’s choices. So, are you living of mere existing? Be honest in your answer.
1 thought on “Are You Living Or Mere Existing? Be Honest In Your Answer.”
Good article about living or existing.